On Friday 22nd December I admitted myself into rehab, for the previous years I had been battling addiction to various prescription medication and alcohol. This was likely the most important decision I have ever made in my life, it saved my life. Little before did I realise what I was putting my body through everytime I used drugs, the combination I took could have killed me any day. I was lucky, I realised I needed help before it was too late, many addicts don’t. Even a life-changing blackout a couple years prior didn’t stop me continuing to use drugs, that is how powerful addiction is. This analogy sums it up for me: that is, imagine being addicted to Oxygen, we all are! We need it to survive. Now, hold your breath, what happens – eventually your brain forces you to take a breath, to keep you alive, to keep you going. Now imagine someone is holding their hand over your mouth, so you can’t take that breath – that is how powerful an addicts craving can be.
“I really mean when I say my biggest fear in early recovery was that I would never have fun again. The beautiful truth is that recovery has given me freedom and the confidence to go out in the world and leave my own mark.”
Tom Stoddart
My experience of rehab was life-changing, of all the ‘life-changing’ experiences I thought I had in the past, this one made me realise that none of those mattered, none of those enabled me to get my life and my health back. It’s not until you’re in a position of complete desperation and come out the otherside, do you start to really value what life means, and that we are not here for a long. So it’s important to do everything to enjoy the time you are.
Addiction tends to stem from some form of trauma, that can be (and is usually assumed) to be trauma during childhood, whilst that is true, it is not always necessarily the path to ‘becoming’ and addict. One thing for sure though, is once you become an addict, you will be fighting it for the rest of your life. Think of it as a incurable disease. Dr. Gabor Maté, an expert in addiction and trauma sums up addiction in this hour long, but extremely insightful video. Some key takeaways:
- Dr. Gabor Maté puts across the concept of addiction and how it can be understood as an attempt to solve a human life problem. He emphasizes the importance of addressing the root causes of the problem rather than just punishing or treating the addiction itself. He also talks about his own experiences with addiction, and how these experiences have shaped his perspective on the issue. Dr. Maté argues that addiction is often a symptom of underlying emotional pain, such as loneliness, and that addressing this pain is key to preventing and treating addiction.
- Dr. Gabor Mate discusses the dysfunctional behavior of addicts and how it affects their loved ones. He asserts that addicts often lie, cheat, and steal, causing trouble and creating a ruckus. He acknowledges that addiction is a self-destructive behavior and suggests that families must learn to interact with addicts in a compassionate manner.
- Dr. Gabor Maté discusses the concept of addiction and how it is often stigmatized through the use of pejorative terms. He argues that the word “addict” originates from slavery, and that the person struggling with addiction is best understood as a person who has suffered so much pain that they don’t know how else to escape from it. Maté emphasizes the importance of approaching addiction with compassion and understanding, rather than passing judgment.
I am personally still discovering what previous actions took me down a path of addiction, being in rehab opened up my knowledge to behaviours I had that contributed to me becoming addicted and taking substances to ‘solve’ life’s problems. Previously I found it very difficult to impose boundaries in my personal and professional life, this usually resulted in my trying to do too much, thinking what I was doing was not good enough and, people-pleasing. For these types of personalities, addictive substances provide a quick and easy release to a world where you stop caring.
I am the rest of my life away from practising the new tools I learnt in rehab, recovering from addiction is not as simple as flicking a switch, it’s a new way of life and understanding that can only truly be discovered by seeking professional help, not medical help, but the help of people who have been there and done it, other recovering addicts, the professionals. The hardest part of rehab, and the theme is common speaking with other recovering addicts, is leaving rehab on your release day. All of a sudden you are thrown back out into the ‘real’ world after being in a very comfortable bubble for weeks. The transition is hard, it took me weeks to even begin to feel normal again. Some advice is would give is, plan your journey back into the real world whilst in rehab, sort any problems or issues in your life that could be an issue when you leave whilst you are in rehab where possible. Make that transition as easy on yourself as you can.
Shortly I am going to create an addiction resources page, providing all of the resources I use to better understand addiction and tools that can help people suffering with the disease of addiction and their loved ones. To be notified once I release this, subscribe to my newsletter below.
“You don’t get over an addiction by stopping using. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier to not use. If you don’t create a new life, then all the factors that brought you to your addiction will catch up with you again.”
